HOPE

I had to play God the other day and I didn't like it....

I remember the month...November. A cool chill in the air. I was going on a retreat, to find myself and find my faith. Divorce makes you lose a lot. I was sad and empty inside. I drove to the dog pound. I had an hour before the retreat. Driving up the dirt road, gravel crunching under my tires. Rounding the corner, dogs barked. My heart pounded beneath my sweatshirt. Walking the length of the chain links dogs jumped and barked. I stopped in front of each cage. I was short on time so I looked each dog over quickly....too big, too scary, too little, too hyper. BIG SIGH.... but wait. In the last cage, a medium-white fluffy dog sat. She simply sat. Eyes looking into mine. It was like she was saying...you won't pick me-I know it.
"Hi Girl" I said. She sat. And looked. As I spoke she never took her eyes off mine. She just tilted her head back and forth to let me know she was listening. My heart fell in love. "I'll be back" I told her. She sat.
All weekend I thought of her. My heart grew stronger that weekend. And on Monday I wasn't as lonely. I named her Hope. During a time in my life when I had none she filled me with so much. For 14 years she made me laugh, she cuddled next to me in bed, she'd lay at my feet while I read a book, she calmed me when I was stressed, and during sad times she let my tears wet her fur as I sobbed into her neck. I will forever be grateful for her and the HOPE she gave me then and the HOPE that will be with me always.

I had to play God the other day and I didn't like it.

(Rest in Peace Hope. I love you.)